As I spent the afternoon memorializing someone who has been in my life for such a long time, I thought back to the things I will truly miss:
11. Her Crown Vic. Julie really didn't like to drive, but decided if she had to drive, it was going to be a big ass car so people stayed out of her way. And it was very roomy in the back seat to pull over on the highway after a night of partying to 'rest'. After her car was stolen, she went for a smaller, less obtrusive model.
10.Her vast collection of Chuck Taylors.
9.Her musical instruments. Which traveled with her where ever she went. And broke out after a few shots of whiskey. Tamborines, shakers, and thinga-ma-jigs that gave it some rhythm.
8. Road Trips. To the Derby. Enough said.
7. Her vast collection of music. From all walks of life. I learned so much in the music department from her.
6. Her quirky ethnic dinners. We would pick countries as our theme-Polish, Italian, etc. Julie did things the country of Saladia (only salads)and "10"-to celebrate my wedding anniversary. Everything had to refer to 10. 10 ingredients, tenderloin, 10 layers. It was her love of food- preparing it, eating it, sharing it.
5. Orioles baseball. We met regularly to watch games at Camden Yards and she never failed to bring her pom poms.
4. Her birthday cakes. She perfected them.
3. Her finger on the pulse. When I had my annual party every year, I would call her a couple of days ahead to find out who was coming. It was like having a social secretary.
2. her love of British literature and film. Okay, I might not miss that so much, but respected her love for it. And we both loved Downton Abbey.
1. Her humor. And her great love for life.
Go forth and be at peace. We all will miss you terribly.
Saturday, November 30, 2013
Tuesday, November 26, 2013
A week of thanks
The holidays are upon us..sort of sneaked in while we weren't looking. This week is by far my favorite holiday...Thanksgiving. it is all about eating, drinking, football, socializing, and eating. No pressures. A day of gluttony. In a good way. I have many memorable Thanksgivings over the years thanks to my foodie parents and their crazy friends and family. My mother loves this holiday and it shows in her massive preparation of every side dish and pie known to man.
In the days where she lived in Annapolis in a small yet adequate duplex, our dinners were big and boisterous. It required 2 kitchens, as 2 turkeys were prepared while the plethera of side dishes were prepared. Let's talk about side dishes for a second. She has always opted for tradition-things that were on her table from her grandmother. That would include celery salad (which sits in a beautiful turkey shaped bowl and remains untouched by anyone's hands), mashed rutabagas (oh yeah, these are popular. Not.), creamed caulifower and pearl onions (I am on the fence about this one..its just a big white food), and cranberry sorbet (not thats a great idea...cleanse the palate for more eating). Since she married my father, she had many thanksgiving dinners with pigs feet and sauerkraut. We have nixed the pigs feet and I am ever so grateful. We kept the Baltimore tradition of sauerkraut and updated it to red cabbage. In fact , some dishes have been updated-rutabagas are now winter puree with carrots and parsnips. We added dried corn and brussel sprouts. There is now some green foods on the table to enhance the orange, brown, and white.
So, 2 kitchens to cook for 18. Once the dinner was served, it was time for after dinner apertifs. Which at this particular dinner ended up being consumed under the dining room table. One year as we prepared for dinner, we searched for the roasting pan that belonged to my great grandmother. We found it. On the back porch. With the carcass of last years turkey still in it.
Ahhh...another year. Bring it on.
In the days where she lived in Annapolis in a small yet adequate duplex, our dinners were big and boisterous. It required 2 kitchens, as 2 turkeys were prepared while the plethera of side dishes were prepared. Let's talk about side dishes for a second. She has always opted for tradition-things that were on her table from her grandmother. That would include celery salad (which sits in a beautiful turkey shaped bowl and remains untouched by anyone's hands), mashed rutabagas (oh yeah, these are popular. Not.), creamed caulifower and pearl onions (I am on the fence about this one..its just a big white food), and cranberry sorbet (not thats a great idea...cleanse the palate for more eating). Since she married my father, she had many thanksgiving dinners with pigs feet and sauerkraut. We have nixed the pigs feet and I am ever so grateful. We kept the Baltimore tradition of sauerkraut and updated it to red cabbage. In fact , some dishes have been updated-rutabagas are now winter puree with carrots and parsnips. We added dried corn and brussel sprouts. There is now some green foods on the table to enhance the orange, brown, and white.
So, 2 kitchens to cook for 18. Once the dinner was served, it was time for after dinner apertifs. Which at this particular dinner ended up being consumed under the dining room table. One year as we prepared for dinner, we searched for the roasting pan that belonged to my great grandmother. We found it. On the back porch. With the carcass of last years turkey still in it.
Ahhh...another year. Bring it on.
Saturday, November 9, 2013
ALS update
I am going to take a moment out of my regular light-hearted posts to vent and share an emotionally charged day today. As all of you know, my dear friend Julie is suffering from ALS (Lou Gehrig's disease) for the last 2 years. It has slowly robbed her of her ability to use her hands, lift a coffee cup, walk to the bathroom, eat, and now the ability to speak in a coherent manner. Soon, breathing will not be possible. I had my regular visit today and was greeted on the porch by Sally, her sister. She wanted me to be aware of the changes that have just occurred in the last 9 days since I have seen her.
Yep, 9 days ago, she had been eating some soft foods. Once she was on a roll with talking, I could understand 70 percent of what she wanted to share. Today, she is on morphine every 2 hours. She is not eating, but able to sip water and other liquids. She faded in and out when I was there. I understood nothing. Except a comment she made about not being able to share her jokes because people didn't understand her anymore (last time I was there she told me she was like Helen Keller..and her words were the same..water is now waaaaaaaaaa). I also understood I love you. She can move her head slightly. She can look right at you intensely in hopes you know what she is trying to say in her silence. And I did. She can cry. And we can share that as well. Hardest thing about this? Knowing behind her non ability to speak is Julie. Who I have known and loved for 35 plus years. Too bad I can't jump into her brain for a while and chat. Like old times.
I so miss her silliness. I miss her adeptness to find complicated situations and make a big joke out of it. I miss her playing the saxophone, even though she hasn't played for quite some time. Oh, how I miss dancing with her. Playing darts at the dart parties. Late nights in Baltimore where we would go home at 1 AM to get money to drink more, even though the bars closed in 20 minutes. I miss her musical instruments that always came with her to parties. I just miss her even though she is still here.
No one should have to suffer from something like this. It's inhumane, cruel, and miserable. Yet, as I left her this afternoon in tears, she simply looked at me and said "Waaaaaaaaaaa......" I left with laughter.
Julie died Sunday morning, November 17th quietly at her home. She had the great fortune in being able to live in her house til the end and be cared for by friends, family, and caretakers. Her friends came regularly to share shots of tequila and fabulous prepared food when she still capable of swallowing. She shared lots of laughter despite what she was facing and she was determined to focus on what was good and present, not what was coming. She made it to a baseball game where they arranged a skybox for us. There were regular girl's weekends, baseball watching, and making sure her cats got attention as Julie lost her ability to pet them. We love her sisters for making it possible to have Julie live and be where she most wanted to be-her home with her animals surrounded with all the people who loved her. Peace has arrived for her, which brings some comfort. Go ahead.
Yep, 9 days ago, she had been eating some soft foods. Once she was on a roll with talking, I could understand 70 percent of what she wanted to share. Today, she is on morphine every 2 hours. She is not eating, but able to sip water and other liquids. She faded in and out when I was there. I understood nothing. Except a comment she made about not being able to share her jokes because people didn't understand her anymore (last time I was there she told me she was like Helen Keller..and her words were the same..water is now waaaaaaaaaa). I also understood I love you. She can move her head slightly. She can look right at you intensely in hopes you know what she is trying to say in her silence. And I did. She can cry. And we can share that as well. Hardest thing about this? Knowing behind her non ability to speak is Julie. Who I have known and loved for 35 plus years. Too bad I can't jump into her brain for a while and chat. Like old times.
I so miss her silliness. I miss her adeptness to find complicated situations and make a big joke out of it. I miss her playing the saxophone, even though she hasn't played for quite some time. Oh, how I miss dancing with her. Playing darts at the dart parties. Late nights in Baltimore where we would go home at 1 AM to get money to drink more, even though the bars closed in 20 minutes. I miss her musical instruments that always came with her to parties. I just miss her even though she is still here.
No one should have to suffer from something like this. It's inhumane, cruel, and miserable. Yet, as I left her this afternoon in tears, she simply looked at me and said "Waaaaaaaaaaa......" I left with laughter.
Julie died Sunday morning, November 17th quietly at her home. She had the great fortune in being able to live in her house til the end and be cared for by friends, family, and caretakers. Her friends came regularly to share shots of tequila and fabulous prepared food when she still capable of swallowing. She shared lots of laughter despite what she was facing and she was determined to focus on what was good and present, not what was coming. She made it to a baseball game where they arranged a skybox for us. There were regular girl's weekends, baseball watching, and making sure her cats got attention as Julie lost her ability to pet them. We love her sisters for making it possible to have Julie live and be where she most wanted to be-her home with her animals surrounded with all the people who loved her. Peace has arrived for her, which brings some comfort. Go ahead.
Wednesday, October 30, 2013
Road Trip
Mt good friend Julie is headed to Dubai with her daughter to celebrate her 16th birthday. They are staying in the Marriott Marquia..1000 a night. She is a travel agent and has a few perks.
Maddie just turned 16 as well and I thought a road trip was in order as well. So, we are heading to..wait for it...Cleveland! Yes, I know, try not to be too envious. I am not a travel agent and have to work with a librarian salary. But on the up side, we are travelling with good friends and Laura and Sean from Denver are meeting us there. We are going to make the most of it. A dinner reservation at Michael Symon's restaurant. A trip to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. A Ravens game on Sunday. And a visit to the Christmas story house and museum (probably a highlight).never mind that the temps are in the 40's...
We are also checking out a college in Cleveland called Case Western..known for engineering. Probably not a front runner, simply because of the winters there, but perhaps knowing she is an hour from the best amusement park in the United States might sway here. Cedar Point is the roller coaster capital in the world. SShh...don't tell her...
Friday, October 18, 2013
more blues than belly laughs
1. Team Dinners.The night before each away game, the parents are asked to host a team dinner, where we feed all 40 girls at our home so the girls have time to bond and socialize. Yep, 40. Maddie makes an appearance, eats in 10 minutes, and has us pick her up. So much for bonding on a night of homework with 5 AP classes.
2. Sister bags. Every away game, we give a girl on the junior varsity team a bag of goodies, candy (we are talking movie theater size), snacks, drinks, and in past years, little pencil games, yoyos, silly putty, tattoos...it has become a competition of who has the best bag. No surprize there...they all play sports.
3. The new coach introduced field hockey homework. I suppose we need to tackle that after Maddie finishes her calc packet with 195 calc problems. And her AP Bio assignment.
She also thought bonding with the other team is important. So we hosted a 'tea' after our game with Arundel (where they beat us 7-1)-everyone brought in drinks, fruits, snacks, and granola bars. Girls walked up, shoved granola bars in their backpacks, and left the field.
4. Senior Night. Seniors are honored their last regular season game. That would include glitzy posters with their pics on them, flowers for each girl, a balloon arch, a vat of crab soup that we sell at the snack shack..all seniors and their parents get it for free(parents usually make cream of crab soup-a highlight. This year our boosters, who support all chesapeake sports, got it at a local seafood place and it was vegetable soup that ran out before the game was half over), pictures, and a gift. A previous year, they were given Pandora bracelets (this won't happen again because we don't have a budget for it because we spent the budget on bracelets).
5. End of season party. Not so bad..we rent a hall and parents bring food. But apparently the tradition is to give each girl an ornament to remember the season by. Never mind that perhaps there are girls who are not Christian. And that each ornament is made by yet another parent at the cost of 4-5 a piece. 200.00. for a trinket that ends up at the bottom of the gym bag.
I am not even sharing positives about the actual sport, where it seems winning is much more important than the team spirit. I know they play at a different level on varsity, but why have a group of 6 girls on the sidelines who only play for 2 minutes? Because the girls who stay in the game for the entire time are club level players. And unless you are willing to send your child to a club level group for a cost of 1000 dollars or more, you are out of luck on the high school level.
Give me tennis. Any day.
Wednesday, October 9, 2013
another library chapter....
Happening in our branches....
Meltdown in the Bathroom
“About 5:40 pm I noticed a man standing by the brick wall outside the bathrooms talking on his phone. He was talking pretty loud. All of a sudden I could hear yelling from inside the men's bathroom. The occupant must have thought he was being talked to thru the door because he was yelling "back off I'm urinating in here you're going to give me a fucking heart attack" The guard was knocking on the door telling the guy to come out. When he came out we learned it was the homeless man, with the green shorts and (now) brown shirt, that is in here all the time. He came out yelling and pointing to the ceiling saying this is all on camera.”
Officer Larson:
“The suspect…was yelling and screaming in the men’s bathroom. I responded to the location banged on the door for several minutes. Suspect opened door and I entered the bathroom with suspect. I asked him what’s wrong, what’s going on? He stated the patron (witness William) was harassing him. The witness was talking on his cell phone about hot rods. He started cursing and threatening. I told him to calm down. After I was satisfied that I had him under control the suspect and I departed the men’s room. When he came out the suspect screamed at the witness. He departed the area on his own. The witness was just talking on his cell phone. He was waiting to use the bathroom. The suspect for some reason thought Mr. R. was talking about him. I know this was not true. Mr. R. was talking about hot rod, bikes, etc.
Also during the day I noticed he was talking a lot to himself in front of computers.
Lost and Found Shopper
At approximately 12:20, a man approached Lynn at the circulation desk and told her that he lost his iPad, touchscreen cell phone, gold bracelet and sunglasses. Lynn checked the drawer and had none of those items. As she was looking in the drawer, he saw another cell phone and told Lynn that it belonged to his girlfriend and he would just go ahead and take it. Lynn informed him that his girlfriend would need to come in and pick it up.
The man is the same person who has attempted this clever trick twice before at the branch.
Lady Changes Clothes in Stacks
We had several incidences with a young lady who spent most of her time at our computers near the hold shelves on Monday. She displayed some signs of being intoxicated but we did not smell liquor or see her drink liquor in the library. An empty vodka bottle was found in the trash by our custodian today. At one point she used the circ desk phone and it was overheard that she told the person on the other end that she had peed her pants at the library. She spent some time in the bathroom (long enough that I went and knocked and checked on her (around 7pm) and took Ralph our guard with me to stand outside the restroom, she said she was ok and was drying her pants. She for a while wore a sweatshirt sort of as a skirt. This look was not really indecent (though odd). I did have to speak with her a few times about playing music and singing along in the library. Upon review of our video surveillance system today it is clear that around 8:10 she takes the sweatshirt off her bottom half near computer 15, runs into the stacks in her underwear and puts on her pants. She left without incident not long after this (though she did say she would see us tomorrow). After reviewing the tape and speaking with our Area Supervisor we have decided to ban the patron for a period of one month for indecent exposure as well as general disruptive behavior. A banning letter has been printed and is at the information desk. We do not know her name or card number. As an additional note there is an incident report about her and similar behavior from last fall and we believe this is the first time she has been in since then.
Meltdown in the Bathroom
“About 5:40 pm I noticed a man standing by the brick wall outside the bathrooms talking on his phone. He was talking pretty loud. All of a sudden I could hear yelling from inside the men's bathroom. The occupant must have thought he was being talked to thru the door because he was yelling "back off I'm urinating in here you're going to give me a fucking heart attack" The guard was knocking on the door telling the guy to come out. When he came out we learned it was the homeless man, with the green shorts and (now) brown shirt, that is in here all the time. He came out yelling and pointing to the ceiling saying this is all on camera.”
Officer Larson:
“The suspect…was yelling and screaming in the men’s bathroom. I responded to the location banged on the door for several minutes. Suspect opened door and I entered the bathroom with suspect. I asked him what’s wrong, what’s going on? He stated the patron (witness William) was harassing him. The witness was talking on his cell phone about hot rods. He started cursing and threatening. I told him to calm down. After I was satisfied that I had him under control the suspect and I departed the men’s room. When he came out the suspect screamed at the witness. He departed the area on his own. The witness was just talking on his cell phone. He was waiting to use the bathroom. The suspect for some reason thought Mr. R. was talking about him. I know this was not true. Mr. R. was talking about hot rod, bikes, etc.
Also during the day I noticed he was talking a lot to himself in front of computers.
Lost and Found Shopper
At approximately 12:20, a man approached Lynn at the circulation desk and told her that he lost his iPad, touchscreen cell phone, gold bracelet and sunglasses. Lynn checked the drawer and had none of those items. As she was looking in the drawer, he saw another cell phone and told Lynn that it belonged to his girlfriend and he would just go ahead and take it. Lynn informed him that his girlfriend would need to come in and pick it up.
The man is the same person who has attempted this clever trick twice before at the branch.
Lady Changes Clothes in Stacks
We had several incidences with a young lady who spent most of her time at our computers near the hold shelves on Monday. She displayed some signs of being intoxicated but we did not smell liquor or see her drink liquor in the library. An empty vodka bottle was found in the trash by our custodian today. At one point she used the circ desk phone and it was overheard that she told the person on the other end that she had peed her pants at the library. She spent some time in the bathroom (long enough that I went and knocked and checked on her (around 7pm) and took Ralph our guard with me to stand outside the restroom, she said she was ok and was drying her pants. She for a while wore a sweatshirt sort of as a skirt. This look was not really indecent (though odd). I did have to speak with her a few times about playing music and singing along in the library. Upon review of our video surveillance system today it is clear that around 8:10 she takes the sweatshirt off her bottom half near computer 15, runs into the stacks in her underwear and puts on her pants. She left without incident not long after this (though she did say she would see us tomorrow). After reviewing the tape and speaking with our Area Supervisor we have decided to ban the patron for a period of one month for indecent exposure as well as general disruptive behavior. A banning letter has been printed and is at the information desk. We do not know her name or card number. As an additional note there is an incident report about her and similar behavior from last fall and we believe this is the first time she has been in since then.
Wednesday, October 2, 2013
community prez
So, in a moment of insanity, I agreed to run for president of our community association. I had secretly hoped I would lose, at the same time we have had no leadership in a long time and I suppose someone needed to step up. Unfortunately, this is a trend across America..the lack of interest and time to give back to the community. And besides, I had just been instrumental in reducing our board meetings to 4 times a year..I can handle 4 meetings a year, right? I ran against the vice president, who had to step in because the president flew the coop. I won 6-3, despite my good friend Sherry who did not vote for me to save me from myself.
I was feeling like this was manageable-until I paid a visit to the former prez who left office. He congratulated me and indicated that the fun is just beginning..wait until i start receiving registered letters and lawsuit papers in the mail. Now, I really didn't sign up for all that. And apparently he often spent time at community properties cutting the grass to avoid complaints from the 84 year old man who lived next door. I don't roll lawn mowers down the road to cut lawns. That's why we have lawn services.
Then yesterday, a board member dropped by my house to give me THE PRESIDENTIAL BRIEFCASE. It is a briefcase that dates back to the 60's, old, black, and boxy. I felt like I needed one of those chains and locks to your wrist when the exchange was made. It contains many secret things that the president needs and apparently, carries to every board meeting. I waited to open it-I was a little frightened to know what might be in it. Gold? Secrets about the neighbors? Classified information from 1920? Finally I gathered muster and unlocked the box..only to find a treasure trove of historical documents and unfinished business. Property plats, lawsuit papers, checks written a year ago, minutes from 6 years ago, registered letters (there is that request to cut the grass) and a booklet on the laws governing pets in Anne Arundel County. Which would not be unusual, but it had been highlighted with post it notes about the perils of cats.
And so my term begins. One complaint about trash location. And the use of a road in the community. So far, so good. I'll keep you posted.
I was feeling like this was manageable-until I paid a visit to the former prez who left office. He congratulated me and indicated that the fun is just beginning..wait until i start receiving registered letters and lawsuit papers in the mail. Now, I really didn't sign up for all that. And apparently he often spent time at community properties cutting the grass to avoid complaints from the 84 year old man who lived next door. I don't roll lawn mowers down the road to cut lawns. That's why we have lawn services.
Then yesterday, a board member dropped by my house to give me THE PRESIDENTIAL BRIEFCASE. It is a briefcase that dates back to the 60's, old, black, and boxy. I felt like I needed one of those chains and locks to your wrist when the exchange was made. It contains many secret things that the president needs and apparently, carries to every board meeting. I waited to open it-I was a little frightened to know what might be in it. Gold? Secrets about the neighbors? Classified information from 1920? Finally I gathered muster and unlocked the box..only to find a treasure trove of historical documents and unfinished business. Property plats, lawsuit papers, checks written a year ago, minutes from 6 years ago, registered letters (there is that request to cut the grass) and a booklet on the laws governing pets in Anne Arundel County. Which would not be unusual, but it had been highlighted with post it notes about the perils of cats.
And so my term begins. One complaint about trash location. And the use of a road in the community. So far, so good. I'll keep you posted.
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